How do I know it's abuse?

Act jealous or possessive and say it is out of love
Blame you for their behavior, saying "you're making me do this to you"
Destroy or threaten to destroy your things
Threaten to hurt you, themselves, your family members, your friends, or your pets
Touch you in a way that hurts or scares you, or in any way that you do not want to be touched
Force sex or sexual acts in ways or at times that are not comfortable for you
Threaten to report you to immigration or to destroy your papers
Get angry unpredictably or in a way that scares you
Blame you, others, alcohol, stress, depression, etc., for their violent behavior
Belittle or make fun of your concerns and fears about your relationship
Threaten to "out" you to family, friends or work
Act differently in public than in private
Isolate you by making it difficult or impossible to be with your family or friends.
Threaten to take your children and/or claim you won't see them again
Make promises to change but does not follow through

Threatening to kill you or themselves, especially if the abuser has access to weapons
Strangling, choking
Stalking
Controlling most or all of your activities

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